Root cause or fights, quarrels, disputes, divorce, even murder, is anger. Got angry, lost control. First lesson of conduct of Rasoolullah (saws) related to anger. First one with anger = shaitan. Shaitan plays with one with anger like football. Anger leads to regret.
Permissible "anger" is not actually anger, but act like it, is controlled, love inside. Eg child islah, tarbiyyah of Sheikh. Sign - positive outcome. Impermissible anger = heat inside, negative outcome.
Deen is this, good conduct. If practising, libaas etc, your bad conduct puts people off deen, give deen bad name with relatives etc, so be careful. More important than loads of wazaif, nafl etc. (Sunnah very hard to practise in this day and age. Imaamah, lungi etc.)
Look at how sahaabah control anger. Sahabi asked for advice. Rasoolullah (saws) said "don't become angry" repeatedly. We get angry over silly things, eg someone's parking. Mumin can never be angry. Dispute - explain with love, not anger. When get angry, focus on Allah.
We have such bad manners. Eg delaying paying people. Give people difficulty. Window cleaner mentioned Hadheeth about paying worker before sweat dried. If you're Practising, don't dirty your white sheet.
Anger with someone, buy them chocolate etc, with smile. Change your posture and outlook. Become humble, not chaudary. Have shame. Those that cuss you as result are the losers. Mishkat - control anger, Allah will fill heart with iman! Nothing can contain such iman except your heart. That's why friends of Allah never get angry, but full of love eg Boro Hadhrat Sahib (would feed others first). So, Allah fills heart with iman and contentment - sleep peacefully no creases on forehead, just noor, always happy. Without this, life full of fitnah and discord.
So, if angry, cool it down. Straight away dhikr, sir down, drink water, lie down. Then will be OK. Never make decision when angry - that'll be decision of shaitan
Permissible "anger" is not actually anger, but act like it, is controlled, love inside. Eg child islah, tarbiyyah of Sheikh. Sign - positive outcome. Impermissible anger = heat inside, negative outcome.
Deen is this, good conduct. If practising, libaas etc, your bad conduct puts people off deen, give deen bad name with relatives etc, so be careful. More important than loads of wazaif, nafl etc. (Sunnah very hard to practise in this day and age. Imaamah, lungi etc.)
Look at how sahaabah control anger. Sahabi asked for advice. Rasoolullah (saws) said "don't become angry" repeatedly. We get angry over silly things, eg someone's parking. Mumin can never be angry. Dispute - explain with love, not anger. When get angry, focus on Allah.
We have such bad manners. Eg delaying paying people. Give people difficulty. Window cleaner mentioned Hadheeth about paying worker before sweat dried. If you're Practising, don't dirty your white sheet.
Anger with someone, buy them chocolate etc, with smile. Change your posture and outlook. Become humble, not chaudary. Have shame. Those that cuss you as result are the losers. Mishkat - control anger, Allah will fill heart with iman! Nothing can contain such iman except your heart. That's why friends of Allah never get angry, but full of love eg Boro Hadhrat Sahib (would feed others first). So, Allah fills heart with iman and contentment - sleep peacefully no creases on forehead, just noor, always happy. Without this, life full of fitnah and discord.
So, if angry, cool it down. Straight away dhikr, sir down, drink water, lie down. Then will be OK. Never make decision when angry - that'll be decision of shaitan